Congratulations on Brushing Your Teeth!

I had to smile when I read this opening excerpt in a recent column by Jane Magrath that a blog reader kindly e-mailed me:

Recently I saw a cartoon that showed two smiling parents watching their child as he brushed his teeth. A banner was posted over the top of the bathroom mirror that said, “Congratulations on brushing your teeth!” One parent was looking adoringly at the child, hands clasped, while the other stated, “I just feel like we’re setting him up to be disappointed in the real world.”

I could relate to this because sometimes I feel like that as a teacher. I hold my breath while a student carefully plods through a scale and let out an excited congratulations when they complete it with all the right notes and fingerings. Deep down I know that this is hardly a cause for celebration for most students; it’s just the weekly reality of poor practicing and failure to aim toward a high level of excellence and mastery. But at the same time I find myself grasping for anything praiseworthy that I can latch onto to hopefully spur the student on toward greater accomplishments in the future.

In the remainder of Jane Magrath’s excellent column, What matters more: talent or effort?, she goes on to discuss the importance of recognizing a student’s effort rather than the talent (or lack thereof) itself. Especially enlightening was the result of the research conducted by Dr. Carol Dweck on students responses to different types of praise.

I’ve touched briefly on this topic in the past, including a discussion of praising character vs. achievement in this post on Teaching Students to Play Beautifully. It’s a distinction that is almost foreign to education in our culture, though, so it’s easy to forget and revert back to coddling students and trying to make them feel good for every little positive thing they do, regardless of whether it springs from hard work or minimal effort. I am inspired anew to develop a deeper perspective as a teacher and use words and teaching approaches that address a student’s character, not merely their achievement. In other words, no more congratulations for just brushing their teeth! :-)

Share and enjoy!

Facebook LinkedIn Twitter Email Pin It

6 thoughts on “Congratulations on Brushing Your Teeth!

  1. Hi Natalie, thanks for sharing. Alfie Kohn wrote a few books on the negative impact of praises on children.

    Actually, I think it really depends on the age of the students as well. For the very young one, I am more forgiving.

    Certainly lack of practice will never win any praises from me. It’d make me feel like a babysitter and wasting my time teaching. In the past, I had parents who took blames for their kids not practicing for the week. Talking about setting their children for failure in the real world!

    I am fortunate that right now my students and parents are all very responsible in their home practice. I weed out the ones that don’t share the same ideas about lessons from the very beginning.

  2. Great post!
    I too am careful with praise and try to talk about what I see a student doing well along with what we can work on. Yesterday I was able to affirm a student’s determination to get through a piece despite mistakes or wrong notes. But I also reminded her of some practice strategies that will help her really learn the piece and enjoy it.
    Then we played a quick-fire note game to drive home the point of actually knowing the notes vs. just guessing at them…she left happy so I hope she will be excited enough to perfect her piece!

  3. There are always things to praise. If a student really is not “getting” something, and is practicing it, then sometimes it works better to leave it and move on to something else. They can come back to it later when they have already developed their skills in other areas, and it may be easier the second time around. “Spiral learning.”

  4. Pingback: Music Education Blog Carnival – November 2011 Edition

  5. Pingback: Music Ed Roundup: November 18, 2011

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>